Nightmares

How cliche right? Have one post on dreams and then now one on nightmares... Haha! I don't know what on earth i was thinking but just a few days ago, i dreamt that i had another paper during the holidays. A specific one just on molecular kinetics. God damn it, but there isn't such a topic in my funmed module. What the hell was i thinking of. And then suppossedly, there was also another one on pharmacology: pharmacokinetics and also on some other shitty topics. To top it off, i got so scared after waking up that i went to Diana's room to ask her if there was really a test. Can you believe it? Argh, i feel like killing myself! Got laughed at by Aaron and her in the end! Well, serves me right.

Anyway, I'm at my cousin's place now. Feels really good to be here at times, coz this place reminds me of home. And btw, I'm sorry peeps if I'm not going home, haiz especially MO. It's not that i don't wanna go home, but it's just that i can't bear to splurge the money. First thing, I'll probably be using someone else's money, which i'll be really guilty to use. In fact, i always have to refuse an offer like this because i really can't stand depending on someone else. The feeling sucks totally. No one will ever know the pride-swallowing siege that i had to endure when i was quarreling with someone back then. But it's all right, at least it's led me to realise that i should learn how to stand on my two feet and work for what i want.

And also because of this, it has at least led me to realise the importance of money. Well, to me, money is not that important, but sometimes it is. My dad always shoots me for this by telling the whole world "My son says that money is not important". It's really hurting and embarassing each time he says that. It's not that i think money is not important. It's just that to me, it's not the most important thing. Sigh, at least he's got me to learn to say that money is in fact, still important. Argh, i don't know... But i feel that i rather stay here instead of wasting the money going back. Shit, now i'm beginning to sound materialistic, but at least, understand the amount of pain that my family has to suffer to send me back and forth peeps. Sometimes, what my dad say is true although i don't really like admitting it. Even if you've got money, you shouldn't just simply spend it coz you've got it. You've got to save it. Otherwise, how do people save up to eventually lead a better life. Besides, i've got things to do here so i shan't go back this time round. I have to say this: MO's a different exception... He's earning freaking too much! Haha.

So yar, i hope that you will forgive me for not going back... Gomenai...