Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Dreams...

Have you ever wondered what dreams are, and what do they mean? From ancient times, dreams have long been associated with predictions of the future, things that could possibly happen such as in "The Pharoaph's Dream".

Just 2 days ago, I had a dream about my previous crush. Well, some of you may know who she is, and some of you not. Well, the dream was really weird. I was standing in VTC in my usual spot next to the phone when suddenly she appeared. I don't know why, but after some time, MO gave me a ring to propose to her. WTH! I couldn't believe that happened. And i didn't know what to do, coz i don't want to commit myself to something that i couldn't decide upon at that time and end up hurting people. But then again, it's her! And i couldn't believe i did. WTH! Do people in dreams do irrational things? I hope so... Otherwise i'll be ashamed at myself. So anyways, back to the dream, she was suddenly in London with me. I don't understand what my dream means. I've already told myself to put it down behind me coz I really felt that i was getting way into her life. And did i really like her 100%? I wasn't sure of that too. Plus if i were to wait for 4.5 years, what if things suddenly change and she's not the one? Was the dream an inner desire? Was it something that i wanted all along? Perhaps i shouldn't even call it a crush coz after the dream i was somewhat happy and smiley. Lol!

But then again, i occasionally have wet dreams and erhem... Yeah, my dark secret! Do you call that an inner desire? Perhaps the lust bit but i really wished i could put all of those back behind and not look at it. Then again, i know that i've gotta face the consequences. So all in all, should i call a dream something that is constantly bugging the sub-concious side of us? Sigh, is it ever possible to let go and not have anymore of these dreams? No doubt, erhem... The feeling is good, but it's terrifying as well... I swear it is! This is probably a scar that i've gotta live with all my life, so please don't think that "I was so lucky"...

Anyways, i've been doing jack shit for the holidays, everyday waking up at 3 plus... and 5 two days ago! Argh... I can't believe it. Thank goodness I've replied to quite a few e-mails today and sorted out my mail folders. Hope to do sth useful over the next few days so that I'll feel more satisfied with myself. And yay, Bleach 62 is out. But there's some problems with the download :( Anyways, merry x'mas to u ppl and enjoy yourselves!

2 comments:

M.O. said...

Porky, your wet dreams doesnt come from your lust .. you drink too much water before bedtime, and so you always pee on your bed.

:)

Porky said...

mo, i don't pee on my bed! do you want me to tell u the colour after i rush to the toilet?